rumors..

Let's face it..it makes anyone angry, at the same time hurt inside when people spread rumors especially when you are the talk of it and it isn't true. It's unavoidable. This is by far the most common social weapon. Although some types of gossip may help a persons reputation, the overwhelming majority of the "shock talk" people indulge in is harmful and mean spirited. To add to the sinister nature of this tactic, it is most often done behind the target's back. The scenario is familiar to all of us - Person A spreads a rumor about Person B to everyone who may be interested and by the time it gets back to Person B, the damage is done. Person B then goes to confront Person A who plays innocent or apologizes half-heartedly. But the damage is already done! True or not some of the people who have heard the rumor will believe it, others will wonder what to believe, and those who know it isn't true will sit back and hope it all goes away quickly. It's better to believe what is coming from the person being rumored about than believing in lies being spreadt by people who just claims attention..the thing about rumors is that they are often difficult to prove or disprove. For this reason, once a rumor is set loose, it almost always follows it's target in one way or another. Very true..Rumors are often used as revenge or for blackmail. And now I wonder..what have I done to make them talk about me that way? I can't think of anything. I never did anything to anyone that would hurt them..but who knows right? Maybe they think that..but I don't..

Browsing in the internet, I found some tips on how to handle rumors..here are some of them:
* Remember that no matter what you say or do SOME people are going to believe the rumors. Your goal is to mitigate damages since it is next to impossible to make everyone believe your side of the story.
* Don't confront the person who spread the gossip about you in a public place or with an angry tone in your voice. Causing a scene or going on the offensive will only make them feel they are justified in spreading venom. It is best to avoid this person all together and to say nothing to them. But if you do have to say something, wait until you are calm and the initial shock has passed.
* Rather than freaking out and running around trying to set the record straight, play it cool! When it gets back to you laugh lightly and say something like, "Is THAT what's going around about me? I wonder why somebody would go to so much trouble to spread a lie?" This does two things; it shows others that you have nothing to hide because you are not acting defensively, and it puts the burden of reliability back on the gossip spreader by making others wonder if there is a hidden agenda.
* Spread the gossip yourself, "Have you heard what so-and-so is saying about me? What a joke!" and do it with a smile. Always sound calm and confused, never bitter and resentful.
* If anyone asks if the rumor is true say, "No of course not, but does it really matter what I say? I just wish I knew why so-and-so started this one in the first place." If it is true, omit the "No" and just say, "Does it really matter what I say? I just wish I knew why so-and-so spread this around in the first place!".
* Calm is the key! Always be calm, even baffled, when the rumor is mentioned. If you freak out in protest it looks like you have something to hide. Even if you do have something to hide, playing it cool is always best.
* Don't retaliate with your own gossip. You are better than that!

:)

I would usually play this song, "When I Go Down" by Relient K (one of my favorite songs), when I am reminded of such problems in my life or if I have problems that brings me down..this song would make me smile 'cuz I know, even if my family or close friends aren't here to comfort me in times like these, I'd still know that SOMEONE would never leave me alone..

<- press play to listen to song.

I'll tell you flat out
It hurts so much to think of this
So from my thoughts I will exclude
The very thing that
I hate more than everything is
The way I'm powerless
To dictate my own moods

I've thrown away
So many things that could've been much more
And I just pray
My problems go away if they're ignored
But that's not the way it works
No that's not the way it works

When I go down
I go down hard
And I take everything I've learned
And teach myself some disregard
When I go down
It hurts to hit the bottom
And of the things that got me there
I think if only I had fought them

If and when I can
Clear myself of this clouded mind
I'll watch myself settle down
Into a place where
Peace can search me out and find
That I'm so ready to be found

I've thrown away
The hope I had in friendships
I've thrown away
So many things that could have been much more
I've thrown away
The secret to find an end to this
And I just pray
My problems go away if they're ignored
But that's not the way it works
No that's not the way it works

When I go down
I go down hard
And I take everything I've learned
And teach myself some disregard
When I go down
It hurts to hit the bottom
And of the things that got me there
I think if only I had fought them

Any control I thought I had just slips right through my hands
While my ever-present conscience shakes its head and reprimands me
Reprimands me
Then and there
I confess
I'll blame all this on my selfishness
Yet you love me
And that consumes me
And I'll stand up again
And do so willingly

You give me hope, and hope it gives me life
You touch my heavy heart, and when you do you make it light
As I exhale, I hear your voice
And I answer you, though I hardly make a noise
And from my lips, the words I choose to say
Seem pathetic, but it's fallen man's praise
Because I love you
Oh God, I love you

And life is now worth living
If only because of you
And when they say that I'm dead and gone
It won't be further from the truth

When I go down
I lift my eyes up to you
I won't look very far
’Cause you'll be there
With open arms
To lift me up again
To life me up again